Friday, June 26, 2009
Even we can't turn ourselves around.
I treat every person differently. I have never known why, but it seems that way. The problem with that? Whenever I 'change', I never know how to go back. What's wrong with not going back? How annoying it is to hear that from someone that changed too. Y'see, I have these friends that changed, so long ago, and I changed how I treated them. Then it started turning difficult. They want me to change back. Do you know how much it hurts to hear someone tell you that you're not the person they came to love? That's why I don't tell them that THEY changed. I couldn't tell them that I can't change back. That I do NOT know how.
That however it might hurt me hearing those words from them I can not turn myself around. :((((((
I'll change back when you can turn the world to face the sun.
PG e i g h t e e n stepped on your garbage at
Thursday, June 25, 2009
A few months ago, I chose to run away. I still do not know which choice should have been right. I ran away and yet the dilemma continues, the legacy still unfolds, in the path I chose to leave. Those I left behind have clenched their fists, folded their arms, and would soon forget. It was as if they had never held my hand and like they never cried on my shoulders. In their hearts I am a ghost that mustn't exist. Shall I be me, and go forth with a smile, or shall I let go of the pain I've concealed for so long? Would no one again wish to help, and hug me while the tears flow like I once wished they would?
Would I never again be wanted?
PG e i g h t e e n stepped on your garbage at
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
but behind this happy girl is a story to tell, a story to tell, to anyone who would listen.
Today, I have the guts to ask myself, what happens when I couldn't take it anymore? Inside me, lies a story, so hidden, unknown, that though I laugh, I know I feel guilt, I don't want to keep hiding behind the covers that I myself have created. How can I stay untainted with sadness knowing that from somewhere, I've tried to forget my memories? Who knew that I would be hiding an embarrasing past...
One I just WISH I could tell.
PG e i g h t e e n stepped on your garbage at